When They Say They Know What’s Best For You

Family members, parents, partners and friends play a great role in influencing your life choices. They usually wish you nothing but good but sometimes they over-stretch that role and prescribe what your life should be like without consulting you on how you feel. This can land both you and them frustrated.

They will be stressed out because you have declined their advice, whilst you will be stressed out by the pressure they are giving.

You know what they say, “You can lead a horse to the water, but sometimes it wants to drink at The Volt.”

The Horse

That’s obviously a twist of the famous “You can lead a horse to the water, but you can’t force it to drink,” but why lead it to the water before consulting with it?

See, close people in your life want to make decisions sometimes without consulting with you or even learning what your main plans are. Somebody may want to be a programmer for instance, then his father decides to enroll him for mechanic because, “Everyone in the family is a mechanic.”

Deeply routed in every , “We know what’s best for you” decision is a selfish decision made out of self interest. If it were not selfish you would be consulted and your interests would be taken into consideration. See, your partner, parent, aunt, sister and uncle’s public image is affected by how you look in the public eye.

That’s why you will realize that when you refuse to take their prescribed actions they hit with statements like, “You’ll embarrass ME” because it is really about them. The main reason they want you to be portrayed as something they love whether you like it or not is their self interest. It is for their ego and they will likely disown you (if they can : e.g your partner) if they are not biologically connected to you.

While some of their advice may be good, they should allow you the right to make your own bad decisions or at least open their minds to hear what your plans are. In fact if they really care that much they should help you fulfill your chosen plans if they are not at all evil, unethical or illegal (in their paradigm).

Never feel obliged to do something you are not into because of close people but learn to speak out without being disrespectful and tell them why you feel a certain way. In as much as you expect them to listen to your side of the story you may also want to listen to their perspective.

You’ll never know maybe it will be such a good idea to abandon your ideas, and drink at their well. I’m just saying it has to be … your own choice.

Feel free to follow me on twitter @Mcpotar and share some of your best ideas.



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