Crying Is An Inborn Strength

Did you know that from an evolutionary perspective. Tears and crying loud were created for social support.

The first thing we do when we are born is cry, thus it is an inborn thing rather than a thing we learn from the world.

A cry alerts other members of a species that their own is in trouble. That way they can rush to defend or protect. Tears reduce the amount of stress hormones in a person.

Yet nowadays people see all aspects of crying as weak. They say it is attention seeking to air your problems.

Yes it is indeed attention seeking, because you should all pay attention when one of your own is in danger lest the danger that has befallen them kills them physically, spiritually or emotionally.

In the modern setting it seems it is actually now more dangerous for one to cry. People make jokes, mock or even insult someone for seeking social support.

However you can choose to be different from common man by actually hearing out whoever you can help.

The one thing that makes action count

Many people do not struggle with taking action. They struggle with taking the next step.
 
See if you’ve been chatting with a girl you like for over four weeks. Meet up,.that is your next step. Without that next step, you will begin to descend back to friend zone.
 
If you are recording music and you have made mileage in that. The next step for you is music videos or.performances, whichever comes first. Maybe monetization.
 
Without taking the next step you only rise to a certain stage then remain stuck on it till you begin to fall off back to where you started.
 
Any effort you put into something increases productivity to a certain optimum value, after which adding effort will not change results.
 
In fact productivity may even begin to reduce.
 
So back to our texting a girl example. Take the next step into dates, into a relationship, into marriage, into raising the family and then into being a wise grandparent.
 
For the artist. Do you think Cassper Nyovest got to where he is by being content with a certain stage of his career? Would he have done “fill up the dome” if he said.
 
“Ah 1000 people for todays show, I made it.”
 
In 2015 Tendekai Tati motivated me when he wrote a post about how we should celebrate and move on. Not getting too stuck in one win to see that there is still a bigger win ahead.
 
I guess people who refuse to move on are those artistes who think they are still relevant ’cause they were hot in 2004 and never again.

Feel free to follow me on twitter @Mcpotar

T1 Wema1 Shows Marked Improvement in New Song “Ndine Boyz”

T1 Wema1 is probably the fastest growing artiste in terms of artistry in Zimbabwe. After listening to his verse in Ndine Boyz I could tell there was a marked improvement from the award nominated Inzwa (read about it here) album which did pretty well.

However many critics at the time were of the opinion that his lyricism and delivery was old school and needed some working on which he evidently shows in most new offering.

T1 is now able to switch up his flow, content and delivery and such. I was pretty impressed by the “Ndine Boyz” song in which he featured two other maestros of the game Gze and GoldFinga. It was a Southerton versus Dzivarasekwa affair.

In the song “Ndine Boyz” he of course talks about how he’s been rolling “wit dem’ boys” in the hood. He uses a lot of witty punchlines, delivery and other devices.

It’s almost like T!1 has reinvented his appeal to target the hip-hop market in Zimbabwe which largely comprises of young people who are attracted to new types of delivery that surface from the USA mainstream.

I mean this is the era of Kendrick Lamar, The Migos and J.Cole where  the traditional Beanie Siegel type straight forward raps if done too much do not make the cut as far as making reach to the audiences.

Gze and GoldFinga equally come with some heat, they manage to compliment these flows without letting our new pro down.

Download: bit.ly/GetNdineBoyz
WhatsApp: +263772740859

 

 

Review: Nox Pleads With Girl In To Stay In “One More Time”

Relationships are sweet when you see a newly formed couple holding hands, blushing and showing a lot of P.D.A on Facebook. You wish you were in love, however with the dynamics, twists and turns you realize it’s not always rosy.

Sometimes we make errors that put the relationship on the line. So many deal breakers that can happen. Bae can decide to drift away and call for a break.

Zimbabwean hitmaker Nox decided to address this issue in “One More Time”, a music offering where he pleads about how his life would be meaningless with out this girl who seems to feel like she is done with him.

He promises to better and this song may serve as a dedication fans who relate may use to lure back a drifting partner.

What I like about it is that it speaks of real life. Every man who has been in a relationship can relate because they have gotten to this point before. There are ways of keeping a relationship long term (you can read about 7 of them here) and this is one of those ways.

Big up to Nox for that fly offering you can stream it below:

Follow me on @Mcpotar for more updates

7 Ways To Keep A Relationship Long Term

Hooking up with someone is typically not much of a problem. Eventually everyone finds their love, but will she or he stay?

Staying hooked is a problem. Relationships always begin on a high note but later they may go cold and people drift apart, new people come along and poof!… It’s over.

I have listed some of the features I think a relationship that stays has.

1. Investment:

People basically are willing to fight for something they have invested in. I am talking about time, effort, resources and compromises. It may be diet changes, change of location etc.

The person who invests the least in a relationship can easily leave when someone more interesting comes along or the other partner gets a little annoying.

From my experience, it will not matter how much you have sacrificed for this person. If they have not invested a lot they have little to lose in leaving.

It’s like a funeral policy. After paying monthly over 6 years for a funeral policy, one cannot just leave because the policy has increased it’s pricing by 5%.

One would just complain and continue.

So if you don’t intend to leave each other, invest in each other mutually. Spiritually, financially and even through acts of service. Investment may be what you compromise or give up mutually.

Do not be in a position where you are only on receiving end or giving end.

2. Communicate

No brainer. Every article on relationships typically emphasizes this one. Without communication you can’t know what your partners needs are. Thus you cannot even invest in the right things that appeal to your partner.

Remember putting effort in something your partner clearly does not need is futile.

Women are good at non verbal communication so at times they will take for granted that the man knows what they need.

So it’s important for men to study and read up on non verbal communication.

On the other hand to avoid misinterpretations sometimes women should just be clear about their needs as well.

General communication above all just keeps a spark of security, pleasure and assurance that something is still up. Imagine if your partner did not text you for over a day when they are clearly online talking to other people. Do you think that relationship would last.

On the the other hand too much communication is no good either. People need to breathe sometimes.

The art of good communication skills lies in knowing when to talk, listen and ignore. It involves knowing how to be clear about what you love and what you hate. How to thank and how to forgive.

3. Define the Vision

Without defining the vision of why you are in this relationship, you will eventually fall out. Inevitably.

If you are just there for the sexual benefits then be clear about it together.

If you are in it for marriage. Define that and make sure you are on the same page.

Do not have an unequally yoked outcome. It always causes problems.

People who use other people usually may pretend to want the same outcomes but time always reveals true intentions.

This is why it is important to “take it slow” and not give someone control over your entire life because they have made you laugh for a month.

4.  Stimulation

On a scientific plane there are hormones associated with falling in love. For instance oxytocin is known as the love hormone.  Oxytocin has been proven to be produced more and more when couples hold hands often or engage in physical touch.

Depending what boundaries you have set in your relationship on physical contact it is important that you at least hold hands.

A study proved that couples that hold hands often disagree  less. Less disagreement means less friction.

On the other hand flirting can also be a mind stimulant, humor and other forms of making each other smile more often than you tress each other.

5. Understand the 5 love Languages

Years ago Gary Chapman wrote a beautiful book on the 5 love languages. People interpret love in the different 5 love languages. Some people value affirmations, some quality time, gifts, acts of service or physical touch.

You have to do research to find out which one your lover prefers.

6. Equal Yoking

When ever we talk of equal yoking what comes to mind is probably the Biblical perspective:

2 Corinthians 6:14 “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?”

Many Christian Pastors notify the youth of unequal yoking, essentially they are saying one will have a hard time if their spirituality with the partner are too far apart or beliefs.

I take it from multiple perspectives.

I believe most problems in a relationship emerge from areas of unequal yoking. Do not get me wrongg, disagreement is good. Differences can be sexy but I am talking about fundamental beliefs such as finance, politics, sex and religion.

If beliefs on those areas are not addressed before hand they will appear somewhere along the line and where there is unequal yoking in any area it means at some point one partner must compromise in order to reach an equilibrium.

If there is no humility in the relationship for both parties to mutually from time to time compromise their fundamental beliefs or succumb to the others those areas will continue to pop up from time to time ttill a breaking point.

As it is theorized that 80% of relationship  conflict arises from 20% of the relationships frustrations.  Your job is to of course find out which 20% those frustrations are and cut them off before they grow into bigger frustrations.

Like I said you will usually find these frustrations around finance, politics, sex and religion.

(This is where mutual investment may come perhaps. Compromising cannot always come from one side.

For instance… if one partner is going to shave his dread-lock because he has compromised his preferences or beliefs over the girls, then what is the girl also willing to also compromise one day for him that she values as much as he did his dread-locks?

Will she also stop clubbing for him, if he hates the idea of his girl clubbing? – Food for thought)

Compromise is a high end investment done to equally yoke people.

7. Respect of Each Other

This sums it all up because when you respect your partner you do not lie to them, cheat them, belittle them or walk over them. You consider their feelings even when it comes to things that involve your individualism.

In other words it may be your legal right as an individual to receive calls at midnight, but imagine a wife or husband receiving too many calls from the opposite sex after hours and saying, “Don’t worry, we are just friends?”

From a legal perspective the partner is indeed allowed to receive calls and so forth, but also from the same legality the partner is allowed to be upset by it.

So respect of each other even comes with those compromises. It may be a bad idea to always be in the company of some of my female friends when the girlfriend s not around to an extent that it raises suspicion to other people.

Thus respect involves a lot of emotional boundaries and it injects a loot of trust. Respect is accountability, “Honey I will be late today.”

It’s me having to tell a certain girl not to just use my profile picture as that  may paint the wrong picture to my partner and me never #WCWing someone else whilst I’m in a serious relationship.

It is all the other 6 points I raised. its compromise, because inas much as you can have your own beliefs or perspectives sometimes your partners need to be heard too. As much as the partner must mutuaally hear you out on another half.

If you enjoy my writing please feel free to give me a shout out on @Mcpotar on instagram, facebook and twitter.

Make This One Your Morning Song #BecauseHeFirstLovedUs

Each day that comes along is full of little conflicts in our lives that may drive our cortisol levels up and drive us in high blood pressure. We strive for an existence full of joy, no struggle and love.

We need to be loved yes. However, everyone around us including ourselves is flawed and they can never love all the time. They can never love consistently and perfectly.

A Hip-hop artist known as C.O.G (Child of God) has actually chosen to tell us about a source of love that is never dying, never ending and always available in his new song titled You Love Me , which was produced by himself. He performed the vocals in a superb manner, not to hit at Zim Hip-hop but I actually paused to check the credits again to check if this was Zim Hip-hop that’s how good this guy is.

Watch it here and proceed with article:

He is also of course the man behind the beats of the 2016 hit by Takura, MaObama and other sounds from the guy.

Now C.O.G has raised the bar definitely as far as local Hip-hop is concerned and this is the music you should be playing for uplift-ment in the morning.

It is a powerful, 5 mics for it. I am sold. I am a fan.

Follow him on @cogbeatz

Hashatag #BecauseHeFirstLovedUs

 

Veryus To Spread Various Tracks Like A Virus

The first thought that came to my mind when I saw the name “Veryus” was the word “Various” and the phrase “Very Us”. Meaning basically the artistes in this young compilation would pretty much be “Doing them selves” (by that I do not mean self-stimulation)…  The project is “very them”.

[If you hate reading reviews just jump to this link: Here]

Now according to this group:
”’Veryus’ is an eclectic collective of artists who have aligned their efforts as a cohesive unit to achieve a ‘break’ in the music industry and creating an art not bound by the borders of Zimbabwe.”

It basically comprises of 7 artistes from my basic understanding: Chengeto Brown, Fluid, Marcques, Mile, Rue, uBu and Verseless Philo.

Verseless Philo of course barely ever disappoints. A soft-spoken Zimbabwean nerd, multi-potentialist, paint-brush like hair-swag , of course you expect creativity from him definitely and of course anyone he works with. Usually we are accustomed to him putting in work with Mile, Marcques and sometimes he does a few beats for T-shoC (another crazy genius guy).

There is good representation of the divas, Rue, uBu and Chengeto Brown who bring balance to this project with that feminine touch. The project is complete with their mellow vocalizations to buffer the more rough side of art represented by the male hip-hop artistes.

Each individual in this collective manages to express their art in their own way to create one big product whose artwork I must say was taken time on and well perfected. The marketing plan looks well organized from the branding and PR marketing perspective.

This compilation promises to be one that leaves a footprint on our beloved Zimbabwean soil before denting it’s edge on the face of the earth.

The Effect of Collaborations

This group has been very wise I must say to collaborate and build something together. Things will always work out in the long haul for those who create symbiotic relationships to achieve goals as a team. Given they have laid structures and groundwork on how to resolve any future misunderstandings they will go where they otherwise would not have gone alone.

I hope this is not just a one time project where individuals from the clique will not be available to create with others for future projects. We have seen this happen in the local sphere a lot and that’s how a lot of brands that once were collapsed.

Using that knowledge of the past as wisdom of the present I urge the 7 (which is a very symbolic number of completion in any religion) to work together and even be there to support each other outside of the business.

We want another Veryus catalog, it’s an impressive catalog. I give it 4 stars. I’m keeping the other one, just in case…

 

Golden Rules For Having Healthy Relationship With Bae (Part 1 of 3)

A Few Golden Rules To Have A Healthier Relationship With Bae (Part 1 of 3)
 
I’m not an expert on this, but if you must pass the information to someone else, quote me as one. I mean, I wouldn’t mind.
 
Now what are some of the things I have come to realize in my few years of existence? As far as romantic relationships is concerned.
 
1. Mutually accept that you all have imperfections. Do not judge the other parties imperfections as if you have none. Unless of course your imperfection is to be judgmental, in which case… #sigh
 
2. You on the same team, never argue to win. It’s not about winning arguments, swaying them to your side. You may win an argument but lose that special connection, because sometimes winning arguments comes with having to seemingly belittle the other persons mind.
 
3. With that said, respect each others opinions and also accept each others differences. You do not have to agree with everything the other person thinks or force them to your own beliefs.
 
4. Don’t enforce change, influence it. People like it better when they feel that they made their own decisions. Influence allows them to do so. Forced change, almost always backfires.
 
5. Don’t judge your current bae, based on the previous one. Allow them a chance to make their own mistakes and no that you will never find a real person with no mistakes. They may not be the same as of the previous persons but they are mistakes nevertheless. Know that you have mistakes too.
 
6. Never use the words “never” and “always” when accusing the other party e.g {“You never listen to me”} It’s basically the best way to start an argument because the other party will cite evidence of where your accusation is wrong.
 
This is Part 1 of 3.
 

P-Oney Drops A Video For Hakuna

We all have heard of T1 right?

Well there is P-Oney, of course I am not talking about an IBM computer from back in the day, but I am talking about a Zimbabwean based music artiste, who recently dropped a video tited Hakuna.

The song talks about nay-sayers, haters and how they spread falsehoods aor look forward to the artistes shortcomings/

The video is a regular local party scene, where the rapper is with  his friends and some ladies in the mix. Jamaican flag colours in the background or perhaps #thisflag, you know yellow, gree n and red.

Everyone at the party gets an opportunity to show off some dance moves in front of the backdrop as the rapper uses Shona to rap.

I will say you will love this one if you are a big fan of the urban grooves culture we embraced back in the day. The hook is somewhat urban groove era like and well rap will always be rap.

Watch his video below to judge for yourself.

The Type of Song You Listen To When God Comes Through

Praise and Worship plays a big role in the Church. It’s almost inseperable but is commonly assumed to be soulful. Few people ever think of a hip-hop song when it comes to praise or even worship but the new breed of CHH (Christian Hip-hop) artists are fast roving it can be done.

We can speak of Courtney Antipas (formerly IllCeey), Prophecy, G.I.L, Whistle and C-Verb amongst others

Well recently I got hold of something by an artist you may have never heard of but is equally thorough when it comes to kicking it. The Christian rapper goes by the name, AN3SU.. He has a song called , “He came through”.

It’s the type of song you should play when God comes through. Given he always comes through perhaps it will have a permanent spot on your playlist if it moves you the way it did me.

He is talking about how Jesus Christ has managed to save him from many struggles and opened opportunities for him. Counting the blessings.

As far as the craft, I am impressed by his lyricism as well. A good message is nothing if the delivery is weak, but you can tell that AN3SU has taken time out to create something fluid for his artistry. II hear G.I.L sat on the production to this. It’s good to know how is sticking to some Kingdom Based business.

You can get the song through any of these links.

https://www.audiomack.com/song/i-am-anesu/he-came-through

https://soundcloud.com/user-692341808/he-came-through