The Speaker Who Hated His Voice
I’m a spoken word poet, writer, animator and rapper today. I have created a large number of writings and rap songs that have accumulated a number of downloads and love from several people around the globe. I am loud and I speak out my concerns by voice or by pen, with no favour or fear as many know me.
There however is this child I know who used to hate his voice and was afraid to speak out and tell his story. He had the funniest and most annoying voice which many children laughed at in schools he went to. It used to make him angry and feel unwanted but he came from a loving home where his father always gave him a book and a pen to tell a story for the day. That boy was me.
I was born on 19 August, 1988 in Bulawayo and it happened that I had difficulties letting out words. I could not speak clearly and my parents moved from specialist to specialist looking for solutions. Doctors at the time could see nothing abnormal to them but said it would be easier to tell as I grew older. My family is loving and I have always felt supported by them but my first day in School wasn’t so good.
All the other children would ask me to talk so they could laugh at my voice. It sounded as if I was squeezing my nostrils and it came out funny and annoying. I hated my voice and I always questioned God why I had to be the one to go through this. To make it worse my grade one teacher at Baines Junior School decided to put me in a class for children with special needs. At the time I didn’t understand what this meant but it hurt my parents and they transferred me to Milton Junior School where I did the rest of my Primary school. I didn’t have so many friends in Primary. I just kept close the few who didn’t join the crowd in laughter. Those were my real friends. They could hear the annoying funny voice but they didn’t highlight it on any day.
Meanwhile I had found myself a new voice. The pen spoke for me and it relieved me when I beat some of those who laughed at me in school tests. I started winning literary competitions for poetry and prose at 9 up to the time I had to focus on my grade 7. By grade 7 however the voice issue didn’t matter to me or people that had gotten used to me. I was also immune to any form of being made fun of.
See I was this thin child, short and had a funny voice. There were so many ways one could make fun of me. I had low self esteem. In 2001 I however I went for a tonsillitis operation which resulted in the doctor seen that I had excess bone and flesh in my left nostril which had accounted for my voice all those years. He removed some of the excess but asked my parents to bring me back for a full operation.
Till today I haven’t gone back for that surgery, my voice still sounds funny but with growing up it is covered by my pitch. I have more confidence to speak to people. I make friends easily. I have been out with some of the most beautiful women yet growing up I never thought even one would listen to the proposal of my annoying voice. I am a Dental Therapist, spoken word poet, rapper and rising infopreneur, not yet been all the places I wish to be, but I know I’m going somewhere.
No matter what steals your confidence, you can restore it and hold a purpose using your exact point of weakness. –[True Story]